What's up with fashion?

I try to stay hip, really I do.  Even as a preschool teacher I still like having that "je ne sais quoi"/"you know I used to live in Europe, and work in a marketing department" kind of air.  It's kind of hard when you're dealing with dirty diapers and paint.  Low-rise pants definately do NOT cut it, but I do try.  So, here's my issue - what is actually in fashion?!! Does anyone really know?  Elle says; stripes, mules and sneakers. http://www.elle.com/fashion/news/g29249/2017-fashion-trends/.  Boring.  I feel like it's all comfy clothes or sheer clothes.  The comfy clothes I rock, the sheer not so much - but where's the fashion trends in all this?  I know, I know, I am really not in that informed.  I mean I just bought a flannel shirt so I am very behind the times, but it truly was easier in Sweden.  There everyone knew what colors were in, and as long as you had something new in that color you were doing good.  Individual, schmidual I say - just tell me what's in and I'll add a little something to my wardrobe.  Why's it got to be so hard? Check out http://takeaim.nu/look-like-you-tried/  Can you help me please?